She’s Not The Right Woman For You

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I’m not crying because of you; you’re not worth it. I’m crying because my delusion of who you were was shattered by the truth of who you are.”

~Steve Maraboli

 

The vast spectrum of romantic relationships is blessed with incredible diversity. Within that expanse comes a complex maze of relationship makers and deal breakers. There may be many fish in the sea, but not all men are searching for the same catch. What is one man’s treasure can surely be another man’s trifle. I discovered if she brings some of these to the table, she is definitely more inclined to the latter in my world. And she is not the right woman for me.

If she refuses to take personal responsibility for anything she says or does she is not the right woman for you.

If she insists you accept her addiction, but she wont accept that she actually has one she is not the right woman for you.

If she doesn’t understand that love is not one big thing, but a thousand little ones woven together like a tapestry she is not the right woman for you.

If she is incapable of saying the three most important words in a relationship – “I am sorry” – and she deems every disagreement someone else’s fault, she is not the right woman for you.

If she understands that contempt is the most dangerous and damaging sign in a relationship but its’ also her preferred weapon of choice she is not the right woman for you.

If she thinks relationships are black and white when they are really a rainbow of emotions she is not the right woman for you.

If she doesn’t support you emotionally in either the little goals or the big dreams that are important to you she is not the right woman for you.

If what she says and what she does are always in conflict she is not the right woman for you.

If she doesn’t really listen with open ears and an open heart she is not the right woman for you.

If she literally runs away to another city or another state or another country rather than stay and talk through the challenging parts of a relationship she is not the right woman for you.

If you share your greatest fear with her and expose your deepest vulnerability and she wields it like a sword when she is angry she is not the right woman for you.

If she’s constantly distracted by technology and can’t center herself for even a brief moment with you she is not the right woman for you.

If she doesn’t treat her own body like the masterpiece of DaVinci that it is she is not the right woman for you.

If she insists that you make all the plans for the weekends but she’s always canceling them at the last minute she is not the right woman for you.

If she says she’s punishing you for what you did at this moment but she’s actually punishing you for what someone else did to her in the past she is not the right woman for you.

If she’s broken so many promises that you’re shocked when she actually keeps one she is not the right woman for you.

If she demands you treat her like gentleman should but she has challenges acting like a lady she is not the right woman for you.

If she always has something negative to say about any person including her close friends and family she is not the right woman for you.

If she would always rather be right than be in love she is not the right woman for you.

If the times she wants to have sex are frequent, but the times she wants to make love are few and far between she is not the right woman for you.

If she’s constantly giving unsolicited advice to others on living a healthier lifestyle and immediately after lights up another cigarette she is not the right woman for you.

If she doesn’t believe in the golden rule and the rules she makes apply to everyone else but her she is not the right woman for you.

If her favorite way of dealing with any disagreement she doesn’t feel she is winning is physically leaving the premises she is not the right woman for you.

If she’s incredibly insecure about other women to the point of seeing mirages that don’t exist she is not the right woman for you.

If she loves to beat a dead horse and initiate the same disagreements over and over she is not the right woman for you.

If her retort to any fact that disagrees with her is that either it was never stated or it never happened she is not the right woman for you.

If she loves to blame you for what her partner did to her in the past she is not the right woman for you.

If she thinks there is room in a relationship for dishonesty, when there is absolutely none, she is not the right woman for you.

If she insists on keeping score but always alters the score in her favor she is not the right woman for you.

If she does not understand that respect, honor, and integrity are of paramount importance in a relationship she is not the right woman for you.

If she has a memory like an elephant when it suits her and total amnesia when it does not she is not the right woman for you.

If the relationship feels so unbalanced it seems like a sumo wrestler taking on a church mouse she is not the right woman for you.

If she tells you to never stop by her home unannounced and she doesn’t like surprises she is not the right woman for you.

If she says you’re the man of her dreams, but the way she treats you is right out of a nightmare she is not the right woman for you.

If she is living in the past and never in the present she is not the right woman for you.

If your gut tells you she’s hiding something or someone she is not the right woman for you.

If she never practices what she preaches she is not the right woman for you.

If she is a splitter- she sees all things as all good or all bad and nothing in between – she is not the right woman for you.

If you feel depleted and drained when you should feel invigorated and alive she is not the right woman for you.

If she is uncomfortable if you cry and she only cries crocodile tears when it suits her she is not the right woman for you.

If she wants you to be more communicative, but wont let you finish a sentence without interrupting she is not the right woman for you.

If she would rather see you deeply hurting than ever admit she’s wrong she is not the right woman for you.

If you are losing sight of the man you truly are, trying to become the man she wants you to be she is not the right woman for you.